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The doc told him that masturbating before sex often helped men last longer during the act. The man decided, "What the hell, I'll try it,"He spent the rest of the day thinking about where to do it. He couldn't do it in his office. He thought about the restroom, but that was too open. He considered an alley, but figured that was too unsafe.
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Brooklyn Nine-Nine is finally back! After Fox callously canceled it last spring after five seasons, NBC picked it up almost immediately, and it returns to the air this Thursday. Detective Jake Peralta Andy Samberg started poking fun at high-strung fellow cop and now wife Amy Santiago back in the first season by turning her accidental double entendres into imaginary sex-tape titles, which quickly evolved into a running gag. Here then is a list of every sex-tape joke that Jake for the most part has delivered on Brooklyn Nine-Nine so far. Title of our sex tape. Amy: What?
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A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug, and have sex. What do you get when you do that? A family is at the dinner table. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, hanging a bit.
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Vaudeville and sex have always gone hand-in-hand. But the Bad Sex Awards are all about who is in on the joke. A few writers are regularly vocal about the prize getting right on their tits: they say that it discourages experimental and exploratory sex-writing, or writing about sex altogether. Sex provokes language that constantly and joyously slips through the barriers of taste, which intersect so closely with social boundaries. One debut writer I spoke to, shortlisted a few years ago, was mortified that his writing, robbed of its context, seems involuntarily rather than purposefully clunky.
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